As we stand at the edge of the Promised Land of marriage equality in North Carolina, I await the moment when I can say the following words I have never said at a same-sex union, “By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you married according to the state of North Carolina and according to the Jewish tradition.”
For forty years our Reform Movement has been working towards LGBT equality. From 1977 to 1997, seven resolutions on gay and lesbian rights were passed by the Union of American Hebrew Congregations (now known as the Union for Reform Judaism) and our movement continues to be a strong supporter of LGBT rights today.
For nearly two decades, Temple Beth El has worked to warmly embrace our LGBT congregants inside our sanctuary while the climate outside has, at times, been hostile and harsh. Some of the dates and details, the upsets and celebrations, the starts and the stops of the journey are outlined below.
On Monday, the Supreme Court allowed the lower court ruling against state bans on same sex marriages to stand thus clearing the way for North Carolina to likely strike down Amendment One which will allow gay couples to be legally married in our state.
For those of us who support marriage equality, it has been a long journey through the wilderness of struggling to attain this fundamental human and civil right for the LGBT community. Along the way, more and more supporters have joined us in the effort.
It appears nearly certain that the day of having marriage equality in North Carolina will come. It could be just hours or days. An interfaith coalition of clergy has begun to make plans for the celebration. The champagne flutes have been purchased and the interfaith clergy who have walked and worked together for more than a decade have outlined a service of celebration. We are eagerly awaiting a court ruling in favor of equality.
May we soon raise our cups and toast “l’chaim” as we say “to life, to equality, to wholeness, and to peace.”
When and if that court ruling comes…
No more will North Carolina’s gay and lesbian couples have to spend significant funds to travel out of state to attain their legal rights.
No more will North Carolina’s gay and lesbian couples have to travel to far off states to attain a marriage license without friends and family with them to celebrate their love.
No more will North Carolina’s gay and lesbian couples have to debate anniversary dates – whether their legal wedding or religious wedding is the one they will celebrate. Their legal and religious wedding dates will be one and the same.
No more will North Carolina’s gay and lesbian couples be wed out of town, only to return to home and find that hundreds of marriage rights afforded to heterosexuals are denied to them.
No more will those of us who are fighting for gay and lesbian marriage equality in North Carolina have to fight this battle.
May we soon be able to move forward.
May those who have been arguing against equality now work with us. Together may we focus on the multitude of pressing issues that weigh on our community from lifting up those who are in poverty to offering excellent education to all our state’s students to creating a sustainable environment for our own children and all children.
TIME LINE OF OUR JEWISH JOURNEY TO MARRIAGE EQUALITY IN NORTH CAROLINA
In 1965, the Women of Reform Judaism (WRJ) passed a resolution calling for the decriminalization of homosexuality.
In 1977, the Union for Reform Judaism (URJ) passed their first of many LGBT resolutions calling for human rights for homosexuals.
In 1998, a resolution was passed by the Temple Beth El Board of Directors affirming full rights of membership to those who are gay and lesbian.
Since 2000, the Central Conference of American Rabbis officially supported their Reform rabbis officiating at same sex marriages.
Since 2003, our Beth El clergy have stood on the bimah in our sanctuary and celebrated the sacred relationships of gay and lesbian couples who have been together – many of them for decades.
In 2011 and in 2014, Temple Beth El worked in partnership with Piedmont Unitarian Universalist Church and Holy Covenant Church of Christ to plan two wedding trips to Washington to offer our congregants the opportunity to make legal their sacred unions. In April, 2011, seven couples were legally and religiously wed. In May, 2014, we returned to Washington with six couples who had collectively been together for 100 years.
In 2012, the Board of Directors of Beth El unanimously passed a resolution opposing Amendment One which banned gay marriage.
In 2014, Rabbi Freirich, as an individual, joined a lawsuit to overturn Amendment One on freedom of religion grounds which the Central Conference of American Rabbis later joined as plaintiffs.
Soon to come, we pray… 2014, the first North Carolina recognized LGBT wedding at Temple Beth El.
