As a Jew, a parent and the Director of Social Action at the Levine JCC, questions of responsibility and accountability are always on my mind. Feelings of responsibility for myself and my children come naturally. I’m not sure if it was the time I spent in religious school as a child or simply the role models I had in my parents, or both, but doing good for people I don’t know has always been at the forefront of what I do and who I am. I was fortunate to get a job six years ago doing what I love.
I believe that most people struggle with balancing responsibility for themselves and others, as I believe that most people – especially Jews – feel a responsibility to help alleviate the suffering of those less fortunate. This balancing dilemma was recently laid to rest for me at my older son’s Bar Mitzvah in July. As I sat there listening to his D’var Torah, I realized that what truly matters is to find balance – in whatever proportions that may be.
Jason began by quoting Rabbi Hillel who said “If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am only for myself, what am I?” and then went on to summarize his Torah portion. Matot, he taught us, is about the balance between selfishness and selflessness – in other words, responsibility for oneself vs. responsibility for others. The solution was a compromise offered by Moses to the Gadites and Reubenites, who wanted to act in their own interests, but whose help was needed to conquer the Promised Land.
For each person, that balance or compromise will look different, as each of us naturally prioritize things differently. However, as long as we acknowledge that this balance must be achieved, everyone wins in the end.
Julie and her husband, Scott, moved to Charlotte 12 years ago from Los Angeles. Julie became involved as a CJP parent, eventually becoming president of the Board of Directors. That segued into her job as Director of Social Action for the Levine JCC. Julie is breathing a short sign of relief following her son Jason’s recent bar mitzvah, before beginning to plan her son Brendan’s bar mitzvah in 2020!
